Wish You Were Here

Go see

2011-01-16T07:55:00.000-08:00

Please pay me a visit here.

New camera, new perspective.

2010-01-10T07:48:00.000-08:00

There's nothing like blowing a bunch of cash to bring a little excitement into your life.

After I finished school for photography, I promptly abandoned it. All the cords and F stops and technical jargon was too much for me. So for the last 10 years I've just satiated my lust for images with a very simple point and shoot digital camera. They're portable and to the point, but very limited. I started to really miss being able to make creative choices in-camera, and I really missed depth of field. It can be so beautiful when the image isn't all flattened out and in focus. So I went and got myself a little digital SLR, and I'm in love. I'm seeing the world through brand new eyes!

Some samples from recent photo outings...

Boo

2009-11-01T10:28:00.000-08:00

I've always been a girl who jumps at the chance to play dress up.

Wedding Project, done!

2009-08-16T09:43:00.000-07:00

JoDee said she cried when she saw them! She also said it was due in part to a painful facial, but I'll take even partial credit for my art moving someone to tears, ha!

Wedding Project

2009-07-20T22:18:00.001-07:00

My friend JoDee is getting married, and instead of numbering tables for the seating assignments she's decided to name each table after a location she's traveled with her soon-to-be husband. My assignment, as a helpful bridesmaid, is to create little illustrations for the locations. It's actually turned out to be a fun project! 6 more to go...

The Life of a Designer.

2009-05-29T09:55:00.001-07:00

"Outstanding work on this! Now, let's change everything you just did..."

The Expert.

2009-05-27T18:38:00.001-07:00

I found this old business card online and knew I needed to have one for myself, so I whipped one up today. My version is no way near as cool as the original. I had a hell of a time trying to match those awesome old fonts. It probably wouldn't be so hard if I had some dough to spend on buying them, but I had to rely on what I've got and free fonts. Sigh. I'm going to finesse it a little bit and get them printed. haha, The Expert!

Antique inspired

2009-05-26T16:34:00.000-07:00

I'm doing some portrait experiments using the photos I found as inspiration. I wish I had finger waves in my hair or something... Next time.

meh

2009-05-25T20:34:00.000-07:00

I've been going to flea markets and buying old postcards and scraps of paper to use in my design work, so for the last few days I've been messing around with stuff trying to figure out some kind of a "style" I can cultivate from it all. My experimental projects were revamping my blog pages. I'm not to sure I'm feeling this one, a little too busy maybe. If the blog itself were all text and no photos, the design may have a chance, but as it is now I think the old timey look doesn't mesh well with the color photos in the blog.

My portfolio blog turned out much nicer, maybe the tones could be a bit less neutral, but overall I like the simplicity of it. I added the Art Nouveau pattern to a scan of an old index card in a style that made it look burnt on, or faded off, depending on how your brain decides to veiw it. I kind of dig it. I'm now obsessed with stained and aged paper. I'll have to put some more thought into this page. Too many pool parties does not do well for the designer's brain. I have to go take a walk now and reset.

Below are a couple of interesting portraits I found last week.

Baci, bisous, besos.

Good food is goooood!

2009-05-07T13:31:00.000-07:00

Last year my mom lost 20 pounds. She had a nutrition program on her palm pilot where she could track her diet and exercise. With all this information in hand it was pretty easy for her to maintain good eating habits. Pretty cool, I thought.

While I was in Paris I had access to some outstanding, and really inexpensive cheeses, and was eating pasta basically every night, so I got a little chubby. I was pretty good at living in denial of this, since I hadn't stood on a scale in years, but when I finally did it was shocking.

Now, I've never been "fat," whatever that means, but we all know there are certain points in our lives where we're just not feeling comfortable in our own bodies. This was certainly the case at this point. While I was living in Portland I had gotten all kinds of great advice and techniques from my sister on how to get my shit together in the health department, all of which I did nothing with, but somehow stored in my memory banks to pull out when I needed it most. So with my mom and sister serving as good examples, I downloaded a program to my iPhone that did the same thing as my mom's palm pilot, and it's been an amazing transformation in my life. Over the last 4 or five months I've been eating really healthy (most of the time) and walking 7 miles a day for exercise, and giving myself credit for it in my nutrition log, and I've lost 20 pounds too!

OK, no one freak out. I've gotten a bunch of lectures on this, weight is such a sensitive subject these days. I'm still in a healthy weight range for my height, and I'm not starving myself. I eat all day. The point is I feel really good as a result, and wanted to blab about it for a second, and thank my mom and sister for inspiring me to learn how to eat right. Thank you!!!!

Haiku & Hello

2009-05-04T14:07:00.000-07:00

Birds chirping, green grows,
with no tears shed for worry.
I'm a blade of grass.

I've been offline. It was great! Design work has forced me to reconnect with the internet at home. Hopefully I won't abuse my privileges and get internet lazy again.

Hi

2009-02-21T13:03:00.000-08:00

Life has changed, for me, considerably in the last month. My head is twirling. I've gone from days upon days of lounging around the house reading and taking long walks and bike rides to suddenly working 14+ hours days with no time to do dishes or clean the house. My OCD is itching for a fix, which I guess it will get because there are two piles of cat puke in the living room that have been there for who knows how long.

I had to buy a car, and I really love it. It was pretty inexpensive, but it's a beauty and runs great.

Taste the Rainbow

2009-01-23T09:04:00.001-08:00

My friend Andrew mercifully put the word out around town that I was starving and in need of work, money, or food, or some combination of the three, and as luck would have it, another merciful soul decided to hire me, providing me with work, money and food! I'm doing PA work for a Skittles commercial for a couple of weeks, woot. So I checked out some of the directors work, and found this really funny short he did for ebay. I wanted to post a link to it, but it seems to be impossible... I'll work on it, because you, really, all should see it.

No news is good news... maybe.

2009-01-09T14:22:00.000-08:00

Nothing doing here. I had to get a new computer, which I am, of course, ecstatic about, but also worried because I am jobless. Work seems to be trickling in though, the rent is paid and the bills just may get paid too. It's nice to have the time to goof off on my new machine. It can do so many amazing things. I'm a little obsessed with it. Today is sunny and warm in LA. I'm gonna go take a long walk.

Ho Ho Holidays!

2008-12-25T10:46:00.000-08:00

I love Christmas. My mom was always really great at doing the holidays, and coming from Wisconsin, with all the snow, it was pretty easy to get excited about Santa. I really, really wanted to decorate this year because I wasn't going home, and I still like to get excited about Christmas, but I'm jobless at the moment, so I had to resist. Over and over I talked myself into doing it. I would walk down to the store and look at all the decorations and trees, and then talk myself out of it and walk home. It's been rough. I'm not very good at telling myself no, but I resisted!

A few days ago, the neighbors who live below me (a real sweet, young, Jewish couple) came up to see if I could feed their fish, Buster, while they were away for the holidays. I agreed and went down to meet him, a very pleasant fish, and then they asked me if I wanted their tree as they were going to be gone anyway! Yay! It was decorated in Hanukkah colors, because they are Jewish after all, and so cute! I'm ecstatic.

So all in all I spent $2.70 on Christmas, for a string of lights. I was in such a good mood when I woke up this morning and saw it sparkling. Santa didn't come to my apartment, but I forgive him. I know the economy is in a bad way. Times are tough.

Happy Holidays everybody. Joyeux Noël!

Shout outs

2008-12-19T11:24:00.001-08:00

I'd like to give a shout out to my mom, who made me this sweater. It's been working overtime 'cause my heating system is wak. Bisous momma.

Ahhh... Domesticity!

2008-12-10T15:57:00.000-08:00

I've been cursed. I really like cooking, especially when I'm gonna share it with people, but there's nothing worse than cooking when the end result is a flop and you're serving it! For some reason the last 6 months of my life have been one huge cooking disaster, and not one experienced in solitude... I had many witnesses to all of my sorry attempts at feeding people. Ack. But I have some fantastic news, the curse has been lifted!!! My landlord has very kindly provided me with a new oven, hallelujah! Today I've been in the kitchen all day feeling real motherly, spreading good fragrances around and washing endless amounts of dishes. So far I made a huge batch of chicken and rice soup with a couple of cornish hens I roasted, warm apple sauce, and banana muffins, all from scratch! I feel my world has been rocked. Tonight I'm going to bake applesauce meat loaf. That's right, I said it, meat loaf, with candied carrots.

Freelance work is a bit slooooow right now, so I've got a little time to mess around, obviously. I've been pretty good at finding ways to entertain myself. I've been wanting to get more into writing these days, thinking it would be cool to have a job where I could write about things I see around, so I applied for a writing internship at a travel website and got the job! Woot! It pays nothing, damn, but I think it will be fun to have the assignments. I'll post the links to the articles as they come up, in case anyone is interested.

Well, that's it for now, I have some more cooking to do. Bisous.

Work

2008-12-06T09:59:00.000-08:00

Well, I did have a website at one point, but I let it sit there for 2 years and only added a landing page, so now I just made a portfolio blog. It's not too fancy, but I suppose it's better than nothing. I'm hoping I can find my dream job... first I have to figure out what the dream looks like, I guess

A must have

2008-11-28T00:28:00.000-08:00

Done

2008-11-24T10:33:00.000-08:00

We finally got the holiday windows up at the Juicy Couture store on Rodeo Drive. I'm soooo sore! Six, 11 plus hour, days, filled with drama, but it's finished. They look really cool. These photos don't really do them justice. The idea is you have a bird's eye view into these rooms, one a holiday feast, and the other a Christmas scene, but all is a little debauched... spilled wine and rock and roll, or something like that... Anyway.... Done! Now I sleep.

facciamo così

2008-11-20T09:09:00.000-08:00

O dio, mon Dieu, Christmas propaganda is already going up! We sat in the back alley parking lot, on pigeon turds, and in the cold, gluing a faux Christmas feast to plywood, with epoxy, in hopes that, when the horizontal goes vertical, everything will remain stuck. Pray for us. If it works, it should look pretty damn cool.

ohmyfreakingod

2008-11-15T10:55:00.000-08:00

Ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...............

That's a sigh of relief, frustration, and the release of mania and insanity. If there ever was a week to erase, this would be it. Oh Man. Computer problems can really bring you to your knees, begging, screaming, crying, pleading, praying for a merciful god to exist in the heavens. My Mac suddenly decided not to turn on, and after a week and a half of trials and tribulations, information mishaps, and hours on the bus running to-and-fro, I now have it fixed, although the hard drive was wiped clean. Luckily I'm not involved in any design work at the moment or this could have really been a devastating blow. I've learned some valuable lessons about backing up. Even my iPhone got involved in the mess, when I synced it and all my applications were erased, ahhhhhh!!!! Technology really has us by the balls.

Everything is fixed now, and back in order. Luckily I only lost a month of photos, and it mainly amounted to an annoyance to have to reconfigure all my preferences from the hard drive I backed up previously. Although it didn't help that it coincided with multiple vet visits, multiple cable/phone/internet service malfunctions, and the absolute worst case of raging PMS I've ever experienced in my life. Now I'm just basically totally broke, trying to release a lot of tension in my shoulders, and dying for a beer.

I've been trying to become comfortable with the concept of "losing it all" in hopes of living my life without being ruled by fear or entrapped by my possessions. Moving around has helped a lot, having to sell off everything I own over and over, and deciding to keep my memories in my head rather than in boxes. The only things I can't comfortably think about losing are my cats (I know they're not "things" but you know what I mean), the rest I think I could give it away, sell it, burn it, and still feel whole and able. The problem is, this is all in theory, and when I conceptualize this scenario, it really is a "losing it ALL" idea.

I see myself in sandals with calloused, dirty feet, in tattered clothes, with matted and tangled hair, content merely to roam the earth, begging for scraps of food and cuddling with roaches in the alleyways of third world countries, like some romantic, garbage fantasy, out of an adventure novel about "finding yourself." In reality it's more of a piecemeal situation... today you lose your computer, the next you lose your iPhone capabilities, the next you lose $500 for the health of your cat, etc. etc... This is the sequence of events I'm having a little more trouble coping with in a graceful manner. This week there were tears, and yelling, I called a bus driver an asshole, I pounded on furniture, I would have given anything to smash all my dishes in the middle of the street... in full, I've realized that I'm a big fat baby. I guess for now it will have to be all or nothing, because the subtleties of loss have me in a headlock, and a pair of diapers.

Below, one photo not lost... Mount Hood and heaven, please note, in heaven there are no computers, cords, or external hard drives pictured.

1 more day

2008-11-04T12:08:00.000-08:00

I'm scared to leave my hotel room, all I do is spend money when that happens.

Slightly bored.

2008-11-01T18:43:00.000-07:00

Damn Portland, why you gotta do me like that? This place, I tell ya... I have a weird relationship with this city, it's good for about 3 days and then it turns sour. Why do I keep coming here, you ask? Well, it's top secret, I'll never tell, but I'm here, and I'm bored. I can't stop thinking about chocolate cake, and I want to drink a pitcher of beer all to myself.

It is really beautiful here right now, lots of crunchy fall leaves, in a million colors, swirling down from the tree tops. It's pretty romantic, actually.

So I'm headed out to Powell's Books, for about the billionth time. That's my Portland hang out, buying too many books. They'll probably send my checked baggage over the allowed weight and then I'll have to pay four thousand dollars to get it home, but that's my style. I love throwing money away. Woot.

This is my 77th post, and that's my favorite number, just FYI.

Spooky

2008-10-31T21:34:00.000-07:00

My friend, Sheila, just moved, and in the process ran across this Halloween drawing I made for her, circa 1994. Perfect timing.

Happy Halloween y'all!

A few moments in Heaven

2008-10-29T10:19:00.001-07:00

Then back down to Portland.

Sewing

2008-10-28T08:27:00.000-07:00

I made a couple of bags over the weekend. I think I will give the dragon bag to my neighbor in thanks for cat sitting. I got the brown corduroy for 75 cents a yard! I love the fashion district. These photos are a little caca, but oh well.

Shrink yer butt

2008-10-20T20:55:00.000-07:00

Cooking for one person is usually a bit of a drag, and up until recently I've pretty much avoided it. My M.O. has been to deny hunger until my head almost explodes, and then run to the nearest fast food establishment, or make pasta with a bottled sauce (I totally miss the arrabiata sauce I would buy in Paris, so good!!!). Well things are changing folks. Suddenly there have been many positive paradigm shifts happening in my life, all movement toward health. I'm not even totally sure how it happened. I've pretty much eliminated cheese and alcohol from my diet, and I'm figuring out how to make meals that work for one person... meals with vegetables! I'm kind of excited.

Something that I've realized is, it's very challenging to be both social and healthy. We're all full of bad habits, and when someone doesn't partake, people put on this weird attitude, like their lifestyle choices are being judged. There's a lot of undercover social conditioning pushing people towards cycles that don't really benefit them. One more reason I'm totally into flying solo these days.

I just signed up for Netflix. I've been watching all French films, practicing, talking to the cats. C'est fantastique!

Babies

2008-10-18T21:18:00.000-07:00

I'm related to this one.

Work related.

2008-10-14T19:38:00.000-07:00

I guess it could be worse.

uh-oh

2008-10-11T17:46:00.000-07:00

There's been a major shake up in the cat hierarchy at my place. Skeeter is demonstrating a flagrant disregard for the rules Olive has been very dutifully enforcing for quite some time now. He has taken over many of her favorite napping spots and started eating his food first, and out of her bowl! My god. I'm not sure who put these lawless notions in to Skeeter's head, but Olive has waged many vicious battles in response to her authority being flouted. I'm trying not to get involved, but inevitably, I'm stuck in the middle, as my lap is choice nap time territory. I hate to hurt anyone's feelings. I need an extra lap.

You like?

2008-10-07T22:05:00.001-07:00

I hope the aliens don't steal this one.

You won't believe it

2008-10-05T15:16:00.001-07:00

Really sorry to continually bore you with the details of my smoothie consumption, but mon dieu, this one was amazing!

I was searching for an avocado smoothie that would end up green, and ran across this recipe. Avocado and chocolate milk!!! What evil genius devised this plan?!?! It was gone in about 10 seconds.

Some assistance please

2008-10-05T09:53:00.000-07:00

I live in a neighborhood that is called Little Armenia. I have a lot of Armenian neighbors, and there are tons of small Armenian groceries in the area. Because of this, whenever I invite friends over for dinner they show up with an entire pan of Baklava as a dinner offering. What usually happens is by the end of dinner everyone is so full that none of it gets touched, and then they refuse to take it home with them because they feel it's impolite. So here I am, a single lady, left with an entire pan of Baklava. I'd like to say that I've come up with a better solution to this dilemma than eating it all myself, but really, I have not. So what I'd like to do right now is appeal to the kindly forces of the universe and ask, please, for all this foolishness to stop, because I'm having trouble getting into my pants. Thank you.

...

2008-10-04T12:12:00.000-07:00

Today's smoothie; Strawberry, banana, lychee juice. So damn good.

I think I'm going to go down to Michael Levine and attempt to make myself something out of The Duchess.

Today we have glorious jacket weather. It's 65, and finally feels appropriate for fall. There's something about autumn that always gets me giddy for new romance. Today I will have to settle for smoothie romance, but it is only noon, so you never know!

89

2008-10-02T14:53:00.000-07:00

The temperature is down to 89 from 96. Better, but still sweaty. I've been sitting in my chair with a fan pointed at myself all day, reading. I think that's about all that can be asked of me.

I forgive you Sonya

2008-10-02T08:50:00.000-07:00

I really try. I've always tried. I try to grow up, and learn things, and do better, and be kinder. I think I'm doing a pretty good job these days, but inevitably, fuck ups have a tendency to occur. Out of nowhere I'll get blind sighted by something unexpected, and everything I think I've learned about acting "right" goes out the window. I just react. Things don't get handled skillfully or with respect to the fact that we're all imperfect and human and doing the best we know how to do. It's really easy to feel self-righteous when you think someone has wronged you, and your ego creates an entire narrative on all the reasons the other person is crazy and misled and you are the one who is of sound reasoning and correct. Ultimately, when all the smoke settles, I'm always left with the sinking realization that, no matter who could be found guilty in a court of law, I don't want to have conflict, and there's no good reason for it, and I don't want to be involved in spreading negative feelings around in my life. So basically I feel bad about hurting someone. I think that maybe they also feel bad about hurting me, and we could both feel better if we agreed to just let all of those feelings go, to release our point of view in favor of harmony. I don't like to feel bad, so I usually take steps toward reparations. More often than not, apologies are accepted, it's a good feeling, but sometimes apologies are just flat out ignored. In these moments, when another person refuses to gift forgiveness, I've come to realize, I have to give it to myself. I'm doing the best I can, and I really do care, and I fuck up a lot, but I'm sorry, and I forgive you, and I forgive myself.

It's hot

2008-09-30T14:18:00.001-07:00

My brain is cooked. I couldn't do a damn thing all day. Even lying around was difficult. It felt like someone stitched a hot plate under the upholstery of my couch. Sitting with a warm computer on my lap and eating a hot bowl of soup for lunch do not seem like the most intelligent things I could have done today... or doing laundry in an un-air conditioned laundromat and walking 2.2 miles to the book store either, but in fact, I did all those things.

Breaking and Entering

2008-09-30T10:54:00.000-07:00

I've been wanting to get up on my roof and have a look around. I was told that the owner of the building recently slapped a lock on the door in fear of someone tipping over the edge and then suing. So today while I had a few extra minutes to spare, waiting for my laundry to get washed up, I went and had a look at the door. The solution was very simple. A screwdriver.

There is a really nice view out my windows, LA downtown in the back, and the Hollywood sign and Griffith Park Observatory in the front. In the mornings there is the silhouette of dark palm trees against the hills and mist (smog, some like to call it) and sun lit houses in the foreground. I've been dying to get a picture of it since I moved in, but haven't had the energy to take my screens off to get the shot. Tomorrow I think I'll take my morning coffee up there and see if I can make it happen. If I slip over the edge, I promise not to prosecute. You've got it here in writing folks. I'm a view burglar.

Bad

2008-09-29T19:39:00.000-07:00

It's been a long day in front of the computer. Not doing anything, just messing around on facebook and googling people for no reason, occasionally pausing to bother the cats or attempt a nap. I actually succeeded at one and then Skeeter decided to meow his head off and wake me up, I suppose it was payback for my photo shoot that disturbed his nap. This is why too many beers are no good. Bad bad beer. Bad me.

oh well

2008-09-29T10:23:00.000-07:00

Half of the neighbors I spoke of before have become a pain in the ass, and another quarter of them have the potential to be. Niceness is nice and all, but overbearing, bossy, and authoritarian is just plain annoying, especially when it's a front for major insecurities, and living two doors away. Doing a lot of moving around, and not having too many close relationships while doing so, I've become a girl who values her alone time. I like to do nothing more often than not, and I like to do it by myself. Suddenly I'm feeling bullied into socializing just because people know I'm home... because they can see into my windows. Ahhhh! (Holy crap, it's raining in Los Angeles this very moment. So unusual.) I'm 31 goddamn years old. I've spent a significant amount of time thinking about how I choose to live my life, and then living it accordingly. Last night I sat through a lecture on how I should conduct my personal life and manage my friendships. I will reiterate... how very annoying. I also had decided to cut alcohol out of my diet, and then had a bunch of beers as part of the socializing, so maybe I'm annoyed with myself as well.

Some other neighbors are getting booted out of the 'hood. There's an abandoned house across the street that had a decent amount of squatters living in it. They would come sit on my steps and drink their beer and then toss the cans in the bushes. Not super considerate or anything. One of them told me he liked the lamps I had hung in my living room. I kinda don't like the idea of the beer guzzling homeless gazing into my windows at night, but I thanked him nonetheless because I was unsure of how to respond in the moment. I had been trying to work up a polite way to ask them to stay the hell off my steps without instigating a rampage of squatters trying to show me who's boss. I still hadn't figured out an eloquent way to deliver my request when one of them started raising a stink outside, screaming and banging on things. Apparently he drew some negative attention to the place because now there's a crew of people over there dismantling their setup, throwing all their found furniture out and ripping all the boards off the doors and windows. Dang. Neighbors are nothing but trouble.

♥ Paris je t'aime ♥

2008-09-28T10:50:00.000-07:00

Today's smoothie is avocado and raspberry, yesterday was tofu, banana, and coffee. So good!!! Blenders are pure genius.

I'm really missing Paris. My friend Andrew, who stayed with me for a couple of months in Paris, has just moved there to take French classes at the Sorbonne. Listening to his stories and looking at his photos is getting me really nostalgic. I'm really happy to be in LA, but obviously there are trade offs. Coming back to Los Angeles put an end to my relationship with my beautiful and lovely Frenchman. I guess distance did not make the heart grow fonder. I'm incredibly sad about it, but at this point, I suppose there is nothing I can do to change it. Interestingly enough, I'm happier than I have ever been, even with loss and lament for a boy and a city. I'm so happy for the time I had there. I hope to return very soon.

♥ Paris je t'aime ♥

Bonjour

2008-09-20T10:20:00.000-07:00

The loves of my life have left me. Now that they have so many comfortable options for sitting and napping they are neglecting me and don't seem to be showing up for bedtime any longer. Last night I had a dream that I was sleeping cuddled up with three monkeys. I think that means I'm missing my fuzzy cuddle buddies.

My friend Yanina came over for a blab session the other evening and brought me some herbs as a housewarming gift. I'm proud to report that I have not murdered them yet, and I ate a caprese salad with fresh basil last night! It felt real cool, eating something from the windowsill.

My friend Maurice is part of the visuals team at Juicy Couture headquarters here in LA, and he has hired me on to do some freelance work for the next few months. I haven't done the wake up, got to work, 9 to 5 thing.... well... pretty much ever, so it's been a new experience. The work is different every day, and there's no computer sitting involved, so I'm totally content. The project we're working on now is top secret, so I can't tell you the details, but it's going to New York. Here's a sneak peak...

I've also started a personal project that I'm really excited about. It's been a challenge trying to find the time to work on it. I'm not accustomed to all this busyness. This project is also top secret. I'm doing a lot of illustrating and researching for it, it's been fun. Another sneak peak...

That's all for now y'all. It's still hot here in LA, but I bet a lot of folks are starting to feel some fall chill. I love the fall!!! Crunch some leaves for me! Wish you were here. Bisous.

A cup of sugar

2008-09-09T22:06:00.000-07:00

You know those neighbors that we've all heard about on the Leave it to Beaver show? The kind that are really great and all sociable and inviting?... You do? Well I have those kind of neighbors. They invite me over for dinners, drinks, parties, and movies, and tonight they brought me peaches! Holy cow. There are two sets of neighbors, two couples, in two separate apartments, both sets equally as friendly and welcoming. One set even lived in Madison for 12 years and went to the UW! Craziness.

In other news I've created a cozy sitting area in my front room. The cats could not be more pleased. I've invited the neighbors over tomorrow so we can all enjoy it together with a little PBR. Uh huh... I know how to treat the neighbors right.

Ecco mi!

2008-09-04T09:14:00.000-07:00

HeeHee. Just found this in some of my papers. I made it into the Viterbo newspaper when I was teaching English in Italy at "Fun English Camp." Hahaha! It was actually pretty fun, but just 3 hours a day had me wanting molto vino by the time I arrived home. Italian kids are brutal, but also pretty damn cute.

The devil

2008-09-01T19:52:00.000-07:00

Cars are evil. They make buying crap way too easy. I rented one and now I'm bankrupt from all the shopping, but the kitchen is looking nicer! I made some curtains and painted it "Apricot." Me likey. Skeeter likey too.

Everything is coming up babies.

2008-08-29T14:54:00.000-07:00

Today I took a little bike ride to see a brand new human down at the hospital. My friends, Dana and Andrew, had a little bitty boy yesterday. Everyone seems to be having boys! What about the frilly dresses and hair ribbons? I guess those will have to wait...

I think It's been over 20 years since I've held a baby in my arms. So weird! He was moving his little tongue around and making funny noises, and he opened his tiny blue eyes to have a look around. He looked like an adorable little Yoda, minus the green and big ears, also no Lightsaber or powers of the Force... yet!

Alright baby-makers, keep 'em coming! I love it!

Babies are the new black.

Smoothie Madness

2008-08-27T14:05:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time since I've owned a blender. I've totally been missing out. I'm currently smoothie obsessed.

Rotten

2008-08-27T09:46:00.000-07:00

I've been so goddamn irritated for the last 2 weeks, and I just can't seem to shake it, real bitchy, real nasty. Everything that can go wrong is going wrong, stupid things, and not so stupid things, like spilling beverages, spending time and money on things that don't work, almost being flattened by mindless motorists, needing to pay $1500 to rule out the possibility of cancer. OK, nobody freak out, there's no cancer, but I won't be able to say what there is or isn't definitively until I dish out over a thousand bucks. What thieves.

It all puts me in the kind of mood where I want to be going around regulating everyone's behavior. "Hey, watch where you're going!" "Pick one area of the sidewalk and let the rest of us have some room too!" "Why don't you learn how to do your job the right way?!" "Shut up!" "Don't call me snow bunny!" (Actually the snow bunny thing was kind of funny.) "Let me show you how it's suppose to be done!" Arrrrrrr! Real cranky, looking for world domination just so I can force everyone to stay in their house and leave me the heck alone.

So what's my point? I don't have one. Just wanted to crab out on the internet for a minute or two. Now I can cross that off my to-do list. Did. Check.

It's Sunday

2008-08-24T21:02:00.001-07:00

- Skeeter likes corn on the cob
- Olive still does not like wasabi

It's Saturday

2008-08-23T23:04:00.000-07:00

Today...

- I decided not to go out tonight.
- As a result I was called a grandma by a 26 year old.
- Olive ate wasabi.
- As a result Olive flipped out and wouldn't let me pet her for 10 minutes.
- I spilled wine on my underwear.
- I bought some books.
- Excitement will ensue.

Bluebird

2008-08-21T22:19:00.000-07:00

By Charles Bukowski

there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say, stay in there, I'm not going
to let anybody see
you.
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I pour whiskey on him and inhale
cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks
never know that
he's
in there.
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too tough for him,
I say,
stay down, do you want to mess
me up?
you want to screw up the
works?
you want to blow my book sales in
Europe?
there's a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I'm too clever, I only let him out
at night sometimes
when everybody's asleep.
I say, I know that you're there,
so don't be
sad.
then I put him back,
but he's singing a little
in there, I haven't quite let him
die
and we sleep together like
that
with our
secret pact
and it's nice enough to
make a man
weep, but I don't
weep, do
you?

Human tuna

2008-08-20T23:02:00.000-07:00

The cats have been all up in my grill lately, it's like I've been rubbed down with catnip or something. They follow me from room to room, meowing, ordering me to pet them and demanding to be held. Skeeter consistently crawls into my lap while I'm sitting on the toilet. Olive follows me into the bathroom on every visit I make and waits patiently in the sink. When I shower, one or both of them wait on the opposite side of the shower curtain, sitting on the toilet seat until I open it and then meowing their heads off while I towel dry. Olive just finished grooming my eyebrows and arm hair. Needless to say I'm feeling well looked after. Maybe it's their way of thanking me for bringing them back to their birthplace.

PDX

2008-08-06T23:47:00.000-07:00

Ohhh Portland, Oregon..... sigh~ Such a pleasant place. Mostly comfortable, totally beautiful, and just slightly boring. Everything here just seems to fit too rightly. All the hipsters are wearing the appropriately quirky / kitsch clothing, and the proper shaggy haircut to go with. All the gardens are lovely. Even the junky houses seem as though they've been Bob Rossed into being the "happy little shack living right over there." All the families look sweet and well mannered. Nothing is out of place, and those things that are, were clearly planned to be that way, because it's now considered hip and forward thinking to be out of place and a bit subversive. Perfect.

I'm enjoying myself. Walking tons, in flip flops. My feet are black with street soot. It's a total disgrace. I'd take a photo but I can't bare to show it. Hanging out at Powell's for hours and hours, day after day, looking up things like telepathy, graphology, and ways to enhance your memory. Sitting in endless cafes, drinking endless coffees. I had some guy in the book store cafe throw his Mark Twain at me and storm out. Hrrumph. Reading about relationships and good communication, all theory and no practice. I miss my bike. I miss the kitties. I miss my huge and comfortable bed. I miss my homies. One more week Portland.

Today's did list

2008-08-05T21:39:00.000-07:00

1. Ate gelato (chocolate, pistachio, amaretto) and talked to my mom on the phone.

2. I love 7.

3. found a new snuggle friend.

Ummm... Yum.

2008-08-03T20:56:00.000-07:00

Maggie and Melissa sure can cook! And luckily I knows how to buy and eats some chocolate...

Well, hello

2008-08-01T08:38:00.000-07:00

I'm in Portland, and it's testing my good humor. I'm extremely sensitive to weather conditions. Gray skies really get into my brain and muddy it up. It's raining. I'm trying to totally dig it. I always loved the rain in Wisconsin because it was such an event. The clouds and the wind would all send warning of what was coming, and the air would start to smell different. If we were lucky, thunder and lightening would join in as a pre-torrential downpour opening act. After the skies had rained themselves out, there would be huge packs of cumulous clouds lounging, allowing rays of sun to break through, streak down from the sky, and illuminate patches of land below. It was the kind of scene you'd see in a Renaissance painting that was talking about the coming of god. Here in Portland it's just kind of a drippy, endless, non-production sort of a thing, that can stretch from minutes into days, with no care or concern for the minds of the residents living below it. I would buy tickets to a Wisconsin thunder storm. In Portland I'd prefer just change the channel.

Waaa. Enough crying.

Picture time. Here's my lovely, empty apartment. I'm picking up my sewing machine while I'm here in Portland, and will be making curtains when I get back to LA. I'm so happy to be near the garment district again. Cheap and exciting fabric! All that a girl could want!

So here's the tour... From the kitchen window, at the back end of the apartment, I have a view of the downtown skyline, just the tops of the buildings, but good enough for me.

Then you walk through the hallway, that gets the really lovely breeze I mentioned in the last letter.

Stop off in the bedroom with the bed that has me going to sleep at 10 pm because I'm so excited to hop in it. That map over the bed is a cool story...

I was shopping at Ikea and saw it. I really wanted it, because for the longest time I've been wanting to wallpaper a wall with interesting maps, but it was $200, kinda crazy. On an impulse I put it in my cart and headed to the cashier, but at the last second I chickened out and put it back. I had to go to Ikea again to get some more household stuff, and one of my old Wisconsin friends, that now lives in LA as well, took me there. I told him about the map, and he agreed $200 was a little steep. About a week later he calls me and says "Please tell me you didn't buy that map." As luck would have it, he works for Daft Punk as an assistant of sorts, and they were in the process of moving their office. They had the exact same map, and asked him to get rid of it!! WOOT! He brought it over in a moving truck and voilà! A good omen!

Then the bathroom. My bathroom in Paris had about half of an inch of space between your knees and the wall when you were sitting on the toilet (sorry for the potty talk) and then 2 inches to your right was the stand up shower. No sink, so you had to either wash your hands and brush your teeth in the shower or the kitchen sink. The green rug there is so soft I want to weep every time I set my bare feet on it. It's amazing how these little details in living can help shape the outcome of your whole day.

I have 2 living rooms! One will be a studio when I get a little bit of extra cash. I'm excited about that. From the living room couch (which is also extremely comfortable, I've never had my own comfy couch. At 31, I think I deserve it) there is a view out the front window of the Griffith Park Observatory. Cool! So basically I'm really happy in this space. It's such a change from the cramped quarters in Paris. I even had a place that was considered a nice size by Parisian standards. It feels good to stretch out, and the cats agree. They've been cruising from one end of the place to the other, getting wild exercise.

My bike is in there as well. Los Angeles has become a completely different city to me from the vantage point of that bike seat. No more tight and anxious shoulders from battling through traffic where every man is for himself with a middle finger to prove it. Now I breeze through the streets with the wind in my hair, and the response I get from the people I pass on my bike is amazing! Everyone is so pleased to see a beach cruiser in the city. They all smile and laugh and yell out compliments. It's so great. How could you not have a wonderful day with that kind of reception waiting around every corner?

It's good to be back with all my friends again too. I missed them. Now I have a whole bunch of friends in Paris to miss! Hopefully I'll get to see them all again soon.

Abierto

2008-07-31T17:20:00.000-07:00

They're open y'all. Let's go salsa.

So where have you been, what have you been up to? I only ask because I want to create an opening to talk about where I've been and what I've been doing. That's how to do it when you're trying to be slick. I hope I'm not too transparent.

I've been feeling inexplicably fucking fantastic as of late. Well it's not really inexplicable, but I like the way those 3 words work in sequence. I've been back in Los Angeles for a month, and I'm no longer a graphic designer, but more of a janitor and and odd job doer. I have no car. I get around on an awesomely comfortable cruiser bike, strapping things like buckets and mops and dirty laundry to it, or occasionally I'll use the bus. I have a huge and empty apartment with the absolutely, hands down, most comfortable bed I have ever slept on, with smooth and soft sheets and fluffy pillows and blankets. The weather is glorious every day, and I get a splendid breeze that slips all the way from the kitchen to the front room. I'm so happy and refreshed to be out from behind the computer... I never want to go back... I have some ideas cooking, they're exciting ideas too.

I miss France sometimes. I feel mild annoyance watching everyone in LA walking around sipping out of disposable cups with straws in them. I start feeling like I want to smack them out of people's mouths. Take a damn second to sit down and enjoy your beverage why dontcha?

This coffee shop I'm in is kicking me out. I'll be back later. Bisous.

OMG

2008-06-17T08:10:00.000-07:00

I'm 31, and it's good.

We're all the little people.

2008-05-24T11:08:00.000-07:00

I'm at the airport. I've been here for about 3 hours and I'll be here for 5 more. I just spent $20 on celebrity gossip magazines and there's free wireless, so it ain't all that bad. It was only slightly embarrassing to be buying celebrity gossip in bulk. The cashier didn't even bat an eyelash. I guess that means I'm not the only one. It's not very nice, is it? Treating famous people like zoo animals and showcasing their every flaw and awkward misstep. I guess we just all like to have a little reminder that it's rough out there, even at the "top."

I needed to get back to Paris a little early, so last night I called about changing my ticket. I encountered a pretty typical scenario, one I'm sure you've all experienced more than once. I, myself, have got 3 other examples ready to share, 2 where I had to get a lawyer involved... but I'll just talk about this most recent experience.

- First they said "NO." Apparently I needed to cancel my existing reservation and then purchase another ticket for something close to $2000. Expedia said it was Northwest's policy (after 30 minutes on the phone), I had to call Northwest instead.

- I called them (an additional 1 hour 45 minutes on the phone). They said it was Expedia's policy, I had to call Expedia.

- I called Expedia (again) and after 3 hours of holding, the supervisor, Robert, said we were going to conference call with Vicky from NWA, and they were going to make an exception to the rules (that they never informed me of) and change the ticket. They put me on hold again for another 45 minutes.

- Finally I called, while still holding, from another line to start the whole process over again. The woman I talked to said neither Robert nor Vicky were on the line any longer and that Vicky had made a notation 4 hours earlier saying no changes would be made. Interesting, considering Vicky hadn't even been contacted at that time. She's psychic! Lucky bitch.

So then it was the same story all over. After over 5 hours on the phone, and riding waves of feeling powerless and manipulated, I began sobbing wildly. Only then did I get results. Another supervisor was contacted, and this time they decided not to hang up on me. They charged me $400 to change the ticket and informed me that I was very lucky that they were making this exception and waving all sorts of other fees. Hm.

I don't want to get all conspiracy theorist on your ass right now, but I do want to say that capitalist society is sick. It's an illness, and it's infecting people who would otherwise be kind and good people. It's like in the film The Corporation where they do a psychological evaluation on corporate America as if it were a human being, and the result of the profile is a certifiable sociopath.

This is the world we live in. These relationships and interactions shape how we view people and live our lives. How we're treated has an impact on a daily level. This shit scares me. Why don't people understand that we're all in this together? I hope we all wake up soon and start looking at the bigger picture.

Scraper Bike

2008-05-19T19:21:00.000-07:00

I was at Sears looking for a scale (because I don't care and can't be bothered with what I weigh in kilos. It's pounds damnit!!) and I overheard the electronics guy telling his friend that he needed to find the Scraper Bike song to play at his sister's wedding, and that he hadn't seen the youtube video for it. I have! I was excited to tell him, so I did, and he told me about his plan to ride into the wedding on a Scraper Bike. The plan sounds awesome to me. I wish I was invited.

I got a little fat over the winter in Paris. Sitting in the house working all day and night, snacking on cold meat sandwiches, and the like, not moving my ass off the couch, ever. My mom just got this palm pilot software were she puts in what she eats all day and then all the activity she does, from gardening, to walking, to cleaning the house, and it tells her what her net calories are so she knows if she's burning enough. She lost 20 pounds! So I got in on some of this action and I lost 3 pounds in a week! Whoopie! Exciting yo. When I get back to Paris I'm gonna be scraping on my Scraper Bike to keep up the calorie burn. Sweet.

me me me

2008-05-17T10:05:00.000-07:00

Portland really brings out the narcissist in me. My self portraiture just flies out of control in this city. What the dilly with that, yo?

It's HOT! Glory hallelujah, praise be the lord, fucking finalement! I don't think I've had a real summer in about 3 years. Being from Wisconsin, with the cold cold winters, I get really excited about the transition from chilly to sweltering hot. Uncomfortably sweaty and ridiculously blazing hot, that's how I like it. My last few have been dripping wet and grey. Bleck. So now I'm sunburned and growing freckles, and it feels pretty damn rewarding.

I have an appointment for a haircut on Tuesday. I'm gonna have all the bad hair trimming I preformed on my own head smoothed out by a slicker than slick professional, make me pretty 'n stuff.

Tanya and I are hoping to get out to the coast today, yippie!

Not much else for the moment. Making babies, per usual.

Bisous.

It has arrived

2008-05-15T22:08:00.000-07:00

Sunburn season.

Thanks

2008-05-15T14:20:00.000-07:00

Word up. What's everyone so afraid of, anyway? Sometimes honesty is difficult, true true, and the immediate results are often uncomfortable, but when you look at the bigger picture, everything just glides so much more smoothly when everyone has all the pertinent information, but enough of the Deep Thoughts from Jack Handy...

I get up on this piece pretty often and just complain my ass off. Waaaah waaah wah. So today I'm going to try and counteract all the whining and talk about some things I really dig. This be the list for today, in no particular order;

A list of things I really get geeked over (AKA, stuff I'm grateful for)

I'm so happy I get to drink coffee.

There's always a ready supply of chocolate somewhere when I need it.

Today I was crossing the street and I sneezed, a girl driving by said "Bless you!" out her window. I thought that was pretty damn cute.

I get to work outside on my laptop in this awesome warm weather. The grass smells great, and the neighbors are playing the soundtrack to the Rocky Horror Picture Show, which is hilarious, in my opinion.

We get to live with kitties and puppies if we want to, and they usually like to snuggle.

I'm eating strawberries. They taste great.

I have a whole bunch of really great friends and family that I care a lot about, and I think they like me too.

There's a really handsome French boy in Paris that I get to kiss when I get home.

I get to travel a lot.

I have two legs that walk me all over the place, and get me pretty much anywhere I'd like to go.

I'm almost as strong as an ox (a girly ox) and I never get sick.

OK, that's it for now. I'm starting to get hungry and visions of sandwiches are clouding my concentration abilities. I think it's a respectable list. Sandwich time... Ciao per adesso.

Chicken butt

2008-05-14T21:06:00.000-07:00

I'm with my laptop, sitting on my sister's porch right now, in the cool night air that has come after a beautiful day that warmed the spring flowers and had Portland smelling all magnificent. Just moments ago I got to enjoy the vocal stylings of a neighborhood junky who pulled his bike over to a nearby curb just in time to vomit all over it. Man I wish I had my own porch in Paris! Being outside rocks so hard, and on the computer at the same time! WOOT! I got some kitty friends out here with me too.

Today I was walking to the book store and this young guy stopped me and said "Excuse me, you look really nice today. You're dressed really good and you got pretty eyes." There's no real point to this story. I just thought it was very kind of him to share that with me, and wanted to make a note of it.

Lots of people getting married. Lots of people having babies. I read about 10 different celebrity gossip magazines on the plane from Paris to Portland. I've missed a lot, because the French don't seem to give too much of a crap about Paris Hilton and Angelina Jolie, and I don't give a crap about whoever happens to be famous over there, or Paris Hilton and Angelina Jolie for that matter, but it makes for damn good reading on the plane. It seems the small dog is no longer the hip accessory, now you have to have a fashion forward baby to stand out in the crowd, or maybe even a gaggle of them.

So what am I talking about, really? Nothing, I guess. I hope that's OK. So how do you suppose a person should feel when someone says to them "I really miss you! I didn't think I would miss you!" Ahhh...... hhhrrrrmm.......Thank you.....??? A compliment so unsexy it's got me wanting to buy many small dogs and have many small and stylish children to shield me from the unfashionable shame of it all.

OK, this ramble is officially over. Would you like to see my sister's cats? They're extra cuddly and I love them lots. They also were mine at one time, the step kids. Golden Kitties, Garbonzo and Tigger.

Hello Portland

2008-05-11T11:43:00.000-07:00

I'm in Portland, Oregon, and it's exploding with spring! It really is a lovely city. Families and babies and cats and dogs and bike riding hipsters all just wandering around and loving Portland. Everybody that lives here totally digs living here, it's nuts! It really is a sight for sore eyes after many months in Paris. Not that Paris is not beautiful, of course, but that would be a comparison of apples and oranges. All the giant fluffy green trees and the fragrant lawns and gardens really get the midwestern girl in me drooling. Being in an urban environment for too many rock solid months can kind of drain some of your life's essence from you. It's good to have a little nature fuel up once in awhile.

I may have a camping / road trip to Spain happening this summer as well. I'm really excited about that prospect, so cross your fingers for me!

I've spent a ton of cash since getting back to the US. The dollar sucks so hard right now, and on top of that, everything in Paris is priced way above what it is here, so I'm essentially paying double for everything I buy there. My first couple of days here were all about underwear, toiletry, and pants shopping. I am now fully stocked for the next year.

Happy Mother's Day to all you mommas! Bisous.

Shhh...

2008-04-25T14:19:00.000-07:00

Do you ever get really tired of hearing yourself talk? I sure do.

I'm so tired of my own opinion, but having a hard time figuring out how to make it in the world without always blabbing. People get real uncomfortable when you're too quite. I'd like to be able to socialize without actually having to participate... maybe that's why I'm in a country where I don't speak the language....?

Anyway. It appears, even in light of the fact that I'm socially retarded here, it's still not socially acceptable to say nothing. Damn. I used to be a real quiet kid. I met a lot of resistance from the rest of the world because of it, so I started blah blah blabbing to convince other people that I really wasn't a menace. It's kind of fun sometimes, and you get to hear a lot of good stories, but now I'm trying to figure out how I can keep the benefits without being regarded as a suspiciously sullen and melancholy individual for not running at the mouth. Why do quiet people get such a bad rep? Because we all think they're up to something... or we're worried they're smarter than us... at least my nutty ego does.

So I'm just shutting up for awhile... at least here. I'm sure I'll be back when I think of something really good to complain about.

Bisous.

Time to Ride

2008-04-09T09:05:00.000-07:00

I just bought a bike for €95 at Carrefour, and had a hectic ride home through Paris traffic. I think my technique will be to ride at 4 in the morning when there will hopefully be no one on the roads. Hopefully

Backpacking Cats

2008-03-27T05:29:00.000-07:00

I wonder if my cats would prefer this over apartment living?

High maintenance

2008-03-23T06:22:00.000-07:00

I've decided that leaving the house and pursuing a social life are both highly overrated activities. Ironically enough, after making this decision, I've run out of toilet paper. I suppose concessions will have to be made.

I had my first moped ride in Paris last night. I happened to be in a skirt and heels, and it happened to be below freezing, so it was a pretty enjoyable experience. A cab driver stopped next to us at a light seemed rather pleased with the outfit, giving my scooter companion a thumbs up and kissing his fingertips while saying "Très bon!" I'm glad someone was happy with the situation. It's always a strange thing to ride on the back of a bike with someone you've just met. The last two times I've done this, the driver of the bike had a round belly, that I of course had to hang on to, whether I wanted to or not. As a girl I don't want anyone touching my belly unless I know them extremely well. I wondered if these boys felt the same. Belly embarrassed, or belly proud?

So what happens when you like someone but they're a huge bossy pain in the ass? Ha! As I write this I can think of a gaggle of people who would probably say the same thing about me.

Well shit. I suppose that's why I like animals so much. I don't have to listen to their opinions about me and they don't give a damn about mine. It's a perfect set up.

Dinner this evening

2008-03-21T10:50:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling quite apathetic about taking care of myself, as of late. There are vegetables in the refrigerator, I just would like someone to come and prepare them for me. The wine is twist off. The chips are store brand generics. Tastes good though.

Today I really got to put my miraculously acquired vocabulary to work at the pharmacy. I needed to get some birth control pills, not for any fun reason, only boring reasons that I won't bore you with, but I didn't know the word for birth control, so I had to try to explain it;

J'ai besoin de contraception pour la prevention de la conception d'un bébé. J'ai besoin d'un prescription?

It was amazing!

Well, in reality it didn't actually go that smoothly. There was a lot of gesticulating and motions suggesting a large belly with a baby in it. That's just because I'm a panicking fool, but every time I used one of my new words they totally got it!! I would have been so lost. Fucking-A-yay-victory.

I'm so happy.

But that was only half the battle. Now the American medical people need to talk to the French pharmaceutical people and see if they will understand each other. I wanted to teach the Americans my new, mind blowing, technique, but I didn't know if it would give them the same confidence it had given me. I told the bartender in an Irish pub the other night and he didn't seem too impressed. Hmm ~sniff~ To each his own. I, personally, feel like a new woman!

No one told me!

2008-03-19T04:41:00.000-07:00

Why did no one ever tell me?!?!?!

A friend of mine lent me some of their Learn French CDs, and yesterday I finally put them on my ipod. In a matter of moments I learned 1,200 words!!! I'm blown away!!! Here are some very important bits of info that I have not found in any of the many books I've bought, CDs I've listened to, or classes I've taken;

- All words (except 3) in English ending in tion are the same in French!!!! 1,200 words!!!!
- 60% of words in English are the same in French
- There are only about 600 words that are commonly used in conversation.

Holy crap! I should be able to learn French in a weekend in light of this information!

This week has been an awesome week in my French language career. I've been getting a lot of compliments, which is always encouraging and feels great. It's the balance I needed after the discouraging happenings of last week. Ironically enough, just now that I'm feeling like I'm starting to get the hang of it, I may be moving to Italy.

I love Paris, but I can't really afford the amount of space that I need / want, especially living with my two kitties. They are so very sad in this tiny space, with only a couple of windows to look out of. I earn my income in US dollars, and after the conversion to Euros, it's a fraction of the original amount, so I really need to start being frugal. That has led me to the decision to move south. I wanted to get down to the French Rivera, but after talking to an agent, it sounds like it's pretty much impossible until August. I'm facing this dilemma, and then out of the blue, a friend of mine who's in Italy says her boyfriend has a place for rent that is less than half of what I pay now, and HUGE! Eek! I feel very conflicted. I've forgotten so much Italian, and I guess I'll forget a lot of my French if I leave now, so it bums me out a bit. This town in Italy is in the south, and near the sea, it's sounds amazing. So what?? I guess France will always be here if I decide to come back, and there's nothing wrong with learning more than one language. Well it's not certain yet, so we'll see.

I'm much happier with my hair after the changes I made to it. It'll be a good cut for the summer... summer near the sea???

Opinions are like @$$holes

2008-03-16T06:58:00.000-07:00

Today I'm feeling very irritated with the French. As a guest in their country I'm reticent to vent my frustrations, but straws have been accumulating, and this camel's back may just break if I don't unload some of this baggage. Sorry to all of you wonderful French people out there, because there certainly are many, but I gotta do some bitching right now, so here I go.

I keep saying my French is terrible, and while it's not prolific, in reality I'm doing a pretty good job. Now, we do have to factor in these few things;

1. I never studied French before coming to France.
2. I work at home, and only get to practice surviving on French at the grocery store and the bank.
3. I don't know many French people yet, so there's no one to practice with.

Those things considered, I think I've come a long way teaching this language to myself. My pronunciation is good, and I never ever walk up to anyone and start speaking English. I always do my best to string something together with my limited vocabulary. So what happens when you try and you try and you try, and you get told it's not good enough? Well for me, I just want to quit.

I have lost count of the endless instances in which, when a cab driver realizes (or worse yet, when I'm minding my own damn business and someone approaches ME on the street) that we can't have a fluent conversation, they proceed to lecture me on how I must learn French if I want to stay in France. Every time the formula is the same with this conversation, it goes like this;

"You live in France and you don't speak French?!"
"I'm here so I can learn French"
"You MUST TRY! We only speak in French now."
I say a few things in French.
I am then corrected on each and every grammatical error and mispronunciation.
I stop speaking altogether.

Telling someone they need to know something does not automatically implant that information into their head in some Matrix style, fantasy, wish-life-were-that-way kind of a way. Telling people they need to do something (something that can often be uncomfortable and embarrassing) and then correcting each and every misstep is alienating and discouraging. I realize that this conversation is born of the desire to connect, and of a simple frustration with not being able to do so fluidly. Fair enough, but it's so damn counterproductive.

To add to this dispiriting dynamic, I've begun to experience an open and alarmingly unabashed contempt for Americans, or maybe it's foreigners in general, I'm not sure. Yesterday evening I was out with a friend, who happens to be from Norway. We were chatting and having some wine in a brasserie. The table next to us was staring, listening, and mocking every hand gesture, exclamation, or laugh that I made. Very annoying and aggressive, I would say. We then left and went to a club. At the club I met a guy (He was Parisian by birth and Asian in ethnicity. I only mention this because I wrongly assumed there would be more sensitivity to discriminating attitudes) who told me, although he had never been to anywhere in the center of the US, that the midwest was worthless, served no purpose, and neither did the people in it. This idea was based off of a meeting he had with one person. We're talking about a region here, and not a race, so technically it would be deemed as prejudice, but to my ears this is utter racism. I exited this conversation only to be entered into another "You need to speak French" conversation, where I repeated a sentence in French 3 times while the guy kept saying "Huh? Comment?" until I said it in English and he said he had in fact understood when I had said it in French. Haha, funny. I'm suppose to work for my rewards, right? Finally, in another conversation on our way out, someone decided to offer the opinion, after knowing me for 15 seconds, that I wasn't very "open." Interesting. After that sequence of events why would anybody possibly want to put up walls?

I know that there are many many people, from every country, who travel to other places and act like ignorant oafs, I think more out of insecurity than anything else, but there are also many people who come very mindfully and respectfully. As a person who puts forth a lot of effort to be aware, it's hard to be considered an asshole for no reason except the fact that I'm away from my birth nation. Bias and short sighted preconception abound in us all, and I realize this is just one of the small ways in which we demonstrate it, but this is the life I'm living right now, so this is the way in which I can think about it as a larger and less personal issue. I am part of the white majority in the US so I haven't had to experience prejudice in the way that many of my friends of African American, Latino, or Asian American decent have, but we have so so many subtle ways in which we flex our exclusivity. Unfortunately many of them are socially sanctioned.

In hopes of adding a mite bit of balance to the expression of my frustrations, I want to add that I have met so many lovely, helpful, caring, and patient French people. People that view each individual as just that, an individual, rather than a symbol of American, foreigner, outsider, or whatever else. That's what I try to do too. I know I fall short of that ideal at times, so this has been a good reminder to me of how I can make people feel when I'm being judgmental or unfair. Let's all keep working on living up to that ideal, shall we?

oh no

2008-03-12T05:18:00.000-07:00

I chopped all my hair off. It started off as a significant trim, and then I think too much coffee encouraged me to keep trimming, and now there's almost nothing left. I'm just like those girls who cry during their makeovers on America's Next Top Model, only I didn't have a professional cutting my hair, and I'm not a model hopeful, just a girl with a really bad haircut.

Well, I actually managed to fix it. It's the same haircut I had in high school, but I guess that's the only one I know how to do on myself. It's much better than the soccer mom hairdo I was sporting yesterday. Ultimately, I like this cut, so maybe it was meant to be.

Please allow me to dork out

2008-03-06T06:45:00.000-08:00

I've developed a disturbing obsession with LOL cats.

This and that

2008-03-03T15:51:00.000-08:00

Earlier this evening I was doing some light cleaning with windex and paper towels. In a stroke of absolute genius I held the bottle in the wrong direction and dosed myself with some fine smelling eau de toilette. Is this because, unbeknownst to me, I exist in a cartoon universe? Next I will be slipping on a banana peel and donning visible stars over my head when I crash to the floor? I squirted myself, sat there thinking how idiotic I was, while toweling myself off, then stupidly proceeded to do it a second time. These are moments I enjoy sharing with the cats. They sit there looking unimpressed, with their hooded eyes staring evenly at me, as if to say "Your idiocy is of no interest to me." Then it's all been put into perspective. I'm glad they have their paws so evenly placed on the ground. It keeps me humble.

I've run out of ways to take an interesting self portrait. This digital age of photography with its abundant consent for unabashed vanity is leaving me feeling uninspired. So tired of the *arm in the photo, 3 quarter view face, looking coy and disinterested, or worse, sexual and vapid, pose* but too lazy to get effective like Cindy Sherman and do it right.

Here is my compromise... I'm wet. Possibly a bit vapid, and still 3/4 view, but pshaw, I've never been wet before!

So I've been in the house all day, working. Last night I had dreams about resizing web pages to fit small laptop screens, all night until morning. I think this means I need to take a walk.

On my walk yesterday I saw an Asian B-Boy in baggy jeans and a tilted cap, carrying a leash attached to a 2 pound chihuahua wearing a hooded, fur lined parka. The B-Boy looked me straight in the eyes and silently said "What." The chihuahua looked me straight in the eyes and silently said "Help!" I wish I could have.

Ignoring you

2008-03-01T17:29:00.000-08:00

I have a ton of stuff to blab about, but no time to blab. I've owned a web address for a year now, and done nothing in regards to it, except use it as a reason to feel guilty about all the things I'm not doing. Let's end that, shall we?

Yes, we shall.

I started designing my website, and learning web design simultaneously. Slowly , slowly, or piano, piano, (as the Italians like to say, I think it sounds nice) I'm getting something done. It's still very quirky, just a page with no links, and an infuriating white border around the upper left corner, but much more than nothing, which it was for a year up until a day ago, so yay!

In sadder news, my roommate Andrew is gone. You know, (this is going to sound very self stroking, but if you understood what I really meant you would know that it's not at all a flattering situation) I'm a very sensitive and complicated creature, well... I think we all are, but I'm particularly tuned in to my sensitivities and complications. This complicates things and makes them very sensitive... ummhmmm. So basically what I'm saying is; I miss the guy. I'm very sorry he's gone. I'm so happy and lonely to be alone again.

What's new in your life? Tell me everything, spare me nothing.

I really do wish you were here.

Un bacio.

xoxo

2008-02-27T10:11:00.000-08:00

These are not my photos, but photos that everyone should see, nonetheless.

Brussels

2008-02-22T11:02:00.000-08:00

I’m sitting in a hotel in Brussels. Trapped, I feel. I have my iPod, my computer, warm beer, and snacks (Fantachoc Gaufres to be exact), but I do not have the ability to sleep or to quiet my thoughts. Not thinking about anything important. Monkey babble. Good old monkey babble. The Internet is not working so I can’t run away.

The people upstairs are wearing themselves out in an all-night-long sort of a way. I heard a lot of slapping earlier, which I can only assume was ass smacking, accompanied by some demure and squeaking exclamations of “ow… ow… ow.” I wondered if I should go break it up. Am I to be concerned for this lady’s safety? I suppose naivety and good samaritanism often go hand in hand. I’ll just take a leap of faith and believe that she’s enjoying herself.

I’d like to leave and take a walk around, but I arrived as the sun was setting and I don’t feel I have a sense for what’s going on in this town yet. That leaves me feeling unfriendly and suspicious. Suspicious and unfriendly walks have never been a favorite of mine. So here I sit. 4am. iPod. Computer. Warm beer. Snacks. Ass smacking.

I have a bunch of audio books from the Portland Library that I uploaded to my iPod during my long dreary winter there. Tonight I picked up where I had left off some time ago when I was listening, during long walks through my pretty Irvington neighborhood, to a book about some scientists in Madison, Wisconsin (hometown pride) who were studying / mapping the brainwaves of Buddhist monks during meditation. Essentially, it’s talking about the extent to which our focus and diligence can alter our transmission of compassion and love, and limit our experience of misery, if we so chose to invest our energy into the practice of cultivating this kind of mindfulness.

I think it’s a worthy goal. I try to incorporate the ideas I encounter when studying philosophy and psychology into my life because I think it’s important to live right, with a reverence for the way things are, and an understanding of why they have come to be that way. Unfortunately theory does not always coincide with practice.

I decided to switch over to some music, hoping to lull myself to sleep, although I don’t know why. This has never worked for me. I always become way too involved in what’s being said (sung) to be lulled. Because I was in some Portland nostalgia, I chose one of my favorite musicians to listen to when feeling sorry for myself, Feist.

This woman’s music is a constant lament over our inability to love and understand each other. I can relate, whole-heartedly. Every time I listen to her, I wallow in this lament. Something about all this sadness feels really satisfying and precious, and I don’t know how to let it go. I see a lot of people slam the breaks on when there's a promise of better things to come. We've really perfected the art of suffering, made it beautiful, sexy even, a comfortable place to live.

The allure of the ego, how we choose to view ourselves, and who we believe the rest of the world thinks we are, has a way of sticking its talons in you. Even facing the sincerest of offers for happiness and stability, ego has consistently swayed my better judgement and convinced me to act ridiculously. I'm slowly working on putting all that theory into practice, and moving from this place of comfort to a new way of seeing things. I think I'm getting closer.

Brussels is kind of a sad little place to visit alone. Dark and grey, everything is under construction. All the major sites are political buildings. Not really my kind of town. Everyone who tells me they liked it here, then follow up with “I was really drunk.” Hmm… I guess that’s the part of the equation I'm missing. The mussels were pretty good though.

Tools

2008-02-17T04:20:00.000-08:00

I've always been for championing the virtues of good communication. It's a hard road to hoe at times. There are not too many of us who are well versed in the ways of eloquent and tactful conveyance of our thoughts and feelings. It's a challenge even to the best of us, but I think we all wish for ease and clarity when it comes to negotiating our relationships. Never fear wayward souls, help has arrived. When you don't know how to say it yourself, have someone else say it for you and just fill in the blanks. Help is here.

I found this link on Pumpkin Girl's blog.

I have a crush

2008-02-13T07:11:00.000-08:00

On Jad Abumrad from Radio Lab.

Apparently someone else does too, because I didn't make this piece of art below.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Knock and the door will open

2008-02-13T04:16:00.001-08:00

Ask and you shall receive.

Well... this could sound very silly, but I'm willing to risk it.

My friend was just talking about one of his friends that was explaining to him the, not new, concept of "Ask, Visualize, Receive," focused energy, a prayer, a wish, however you care to view it. I'm sure many people would scoff at this idea, but I think there's something to it, so I'm making a request;

If anyone is reading this, and you have a few extra moments in your day, could you make a small wish for my kitty Skeeter? In the last year he's developed some kind of allergy, to food I think, but because I've had to keep changing his food, and I'm not finding the right prescription here in Paris, he's been an itching, twitching mess for months and months now. It's so hard to see him so uncomfortable everyday. I feel really helpless. I try to give him little massages to help him relax, but it's only momentary relief. I've tried making the cat food myself, so I know what goes into it, but the cats won't eat it. I have him on some new food now, that doesn't seem to be having much effect, but it takes 3 months to tell. Anyway, before I get too long winded, I just figured that a little extra positive thinking directed his way couldn't hurt!

So if you have time to ask and visualize, could you think about Skeeter as a healthy and itchless kitty? I'm sure he would appreciate the effort!

Thank you, merci, grazie, Shukran, gracias, tack, salamat, xie xie.....

Language Lessons

2008-02-12T10:23:00.001-08:00

The haiku project below has moved here.

俳句

2008-02-10T10:49:00.000-08:00

When I was living in Italy I was jobless and friendless for well over a month. I spent most of my time wandering around taking photos of whatever. I was also trying to learn Italian at the time, so I was making use of different online translators. No matter what combination of words I entered they always seemed to return some ridiculous solution. Also at this time, my sister was writing haiku poems to accompany images that she was posting on her photo blog. So these 3 elements, the photos, the funny translations, and the haiku poems, together gave me the idea to write poems in English Translate them into Italian, and then translate them back into English and see what chance may bring. I never ended up starting the project, but I think I'd like to start now, so here goes.

Haiku #1, here goes... a haiku about a haiku. A meta haiku...

five seven and five
these parts are part of the whole
they need each other

cinq sept et cinq
ces pièces font partie du tout qu'elles
s'ont besoin

five seven and five
these parts belong to the whole
that they need

I think it would add some much needed hilarity if I wrote it in my horrid version of the French language first and then translate it to English. Maybe this would be a good exercise for me as well, as far as learning French grammar goes. I will try this next time.

...

2008-02-09T07:25:00.000-08:00

I just spent 2 hours rotoscoping an image that inexplicably disappeared from my hard drive.

I'm going to have another cup of coffee so I can wallow in the depths of insanity and try not to let this ruin my day.

Africa

2008-02-08T06:14:00.000-08:00

I somehow ended up in Africa last week.

Andrew was in the south of Spain visiting some friends and sent me an email saying I should meet him in Tangiers the next day for a drink at the bar. It sounded a little insane, so I thought maybe I should try it. I left the next afternoon, and arrived in Morocco that evening. I got ripped off the moment I stepped off the plane, agreeing to a cab ride to the Continental Hotel for a price of 200 Durham, 100 more than I should have paid. The hotel was amazing. I was immediately in awe. Although we were unable to get the proposed drink at the bar (understandably so in a country that's predominately Muslim) we made the most of the evening.

Around 5:30 in the morning I woke to hear a mysterious voice echoing through the streets and houses on the hill in Tangiers. The man who had scared me the night before, by waiting for me in the dark at the bottom of the stairs, with the pointy hood of his jalaba pulled over his head, was now practicing his morning prayer ritual. The voice moved from outdoors to the echoing halls of the hotel. Voices from other rooms joined "Hey man! I'm trying to get some sleep!" I guess they didn't get the Moroccan memo either. "Be ready to wake up to chanting every morning at 5." It was rather surreal and otherworldly. This was a tradition we experienced all the way to the end of the trip. Marrakech was the most amazing, because the voices came from all over the city in chorus. I went back to bed, and in the morning, enjoyed a bread filled breakfast in the hot sun before setting off on the train to Casablanca.

The main languages spoken in Morocco are French and Arabic, and some broken English (and actually Spanish too, I think), so most of the time I had to resort to using my infant French to order food, buy tickets, and also to kick the family who had stolen our first class cabin out and send them to second class, which was exactly the same as the first class. Despite the sameness of this cabin to the cabin where her actual seat was, the grandma of the family decided she would be happier to stay where she was eating her greasy, smelly shawarma sandwich with a toothless grin. Before she could finish, the person whose seat she had stolen showed up and finished the kicking out process for me. She left after delivering some disparaging remarks and packing up her luggage and sandwich. With the wafting meat odor and the greasy film on the table, she would not be forgotten.

At long last the train was moving, and landscapes were flying by the window. I stepped out of the cabin for some relief from the ghost of the shawarma and went to the window to have a closer look. I was standing there thinking that it was all a sight for sore eyes when the window in front of them exploded. Glass flew into my eyes, hair, onto my clothes and skin. Images of the man and woman on a bus in the Moroccan dessert, from the movie Babel, came to mind. I was sure I had been shot. I didn't scream or yell, totally stunned, I walked to my cabin and sat down in my seat, covered in shards of glass.

Seconds later there were 3 train conductors there, asking me what happened and if there was glass in my eyes, in a confusing mixture of French and English. I answered back in the same confusing mix, still not really too sure of what had happened. There were small particles of glass, or something in my eyes, so the conductors took me down to the bathroom and had me rinse my eyes out and splashed water all over my skin to wash away the other bits of window still on me. They were very worried and asked over and over if I would like to see a doctor. It seemed that everything was OK, so I declined, and one of the conductors pinched my cheek and smiled at me.

Maybe I was still in shock, but I felt surprisingly calm. I reassured myself that it was in fact a rock that had been thrown, and not a gun shot, and tried to convince myself that it was not at all personal, maybe just a kid with lucky aim. I did OK with this line of thinking, until I started to feel like there was still a sliver of glass in my eye. I looked and looked again, not really seeing anything, but feeling something. I began to imagine an infection that would ultimately rot my eyeball out. I started to feel a bit panicked. Who would I be without my right eyeball? How would the world receive me? Oh! Pirates! Pirates are cool right? I could rock an eye patch, couldn't I? I decided I could. Once that was settled I felt much better. I was ready for Casablanca.

Now as a tourist, going into the lives of other people from other cultures, I feel some responsibility towards being respectful, and grateful for the opportunity, so I kind of hate to say this but, Casablanca was a dump. In its defense, we didn't get to see a whole lot of it, so there could be some really beautiful pockets that I just missed out on. The beach wasn't so bad, but the city felt rough. Nonetheless, we were welcomed, and everyone was extremely patient with my poor French, even acting as if they understood every word! Thanks guys! We wanted to go to Fes and Marrakech as well, but were running out of time, so we decided to hit the road and just spend the last couple of days in Marrakech.

Marrakech was definitely the highlight. Huge markets with snake charmers, monkeys, filthy cats everywhere, kids following you and giving you directions that you don't need to guilt you into handing over some change for their services, people yelling "Fish and chips!" at you as you pass, based on the assumption that you're from England, snail soup vendors, and just about anything else you can imagine. I got duped into letting one of the market girls scrawl some clunky looking henna swirls, that she squirted out of a syringe, onto my hand. She said she would "give" me a flower because she liked my eyes. Stupidly, I let her "give" it to me. Then when she was done she said I needed to give her a present. I told her I didn't have anything (I didn't) and she commenced to chase after me screaming, demanding anything. I had half a bottle of water that I jokingly said I would give her and she screamed "Yes! give it to me!" and I said "No!" because I didn't like her attitude and she let me go but not before she got the chance to scream "Fuck your mother!" in perfect English.

After being to Europe a couple of times, it starts to kind of blend with my perceptions of the US. There are so many connections and similarities. I think the first time I went to Spain I experienced some mild culture shock, but since then haven't noticed much. In Morocco, on my second day, my head was spinning. My brain was totally packed full of thoughts and ideas, new smells and images. Totally over stimulated. Time for the hammam!

Andrew and I decided to get the full deal at the hammam, a bath house / massage treatment experience, an hour long massage, steam, and your own personal bather that lathers you up, scrubs you down, throws mud on you, and then dumps a bucket of water over your head. It was so great to be treated like a baby for once! I didn't have to do anything! I just stood there with my arms out, while my bather, Sunnah, rubbed black soap all over me and then rinsed me all off. Well, I did have to do one thing... It was politely suggested in hushed tones that it was possible for me to leave a bit of extra cash for the services. I didn't have much of a problem with that. That's the first butt massage and warm bucket of water over the head I've had in years.

Sadly, the journey had to come to an end. We spent the last night of our stay in Marrakech on the roof top of our riad, Lapis Lazuli, eating pizza and drinking Moroccan wine in our new jalabas. There was some commotion down in the street and we peered over the edge to look, a man had a woman and her two kids cornered, yelling at her, while another man stood between them holding his arms out to protect the woman. The argument lasted for some time, until the man who was yelling reached out and grabbed the smallest child. Shocked, I yelled out "NO! You can't take that baby!" The man, and everyone in the street, looked up as he walked away with the woman's child. The caretaker of the riad must have heard me shouting and came up to the terrace, joining us in looking over the edge. In French she said something about a divorce. I said "Je suis triste." She laughed at me. Andrew and I were both drunk and donning a jabala. We must have looked ridiculous to her.

The excitement of the last few days had me drinking too much wine, and the trip ended in vomit at the Marrakech airport. Again I was asked if I wanted to see a doctor. They're really on the ball with that one. I didn't see one. I just kept puking and cursing myself until I got it all out. We flew, they fed us, and now we're back in Paris, as if nothing ever happened. It's weird what your brain can go through in the time span of just a few days.

Everything I need to make it in Paris.

2008-01-31T07:11:00.000-08:00

I tell you what, if you've ever considered moving out of the country you grew up in, but for whatever reason decided against it, I'm advising you to reconsider. The mail you will receive as a result makes it all worth it.

With my escargot keychain, my Paris wrist warmers, and my guide to finding my inner French girl. I'm totally made.

Thank you Carlos, PumpkinGirl, and parents (respectively), and all my other magnificent friends who have taken the time to send me warm thoughts and well wishes through the post. Mail can really make your day!

2day.

2008-01-30T15:30:00.000-08:00

Eating gnocchi.

Been sitting in front of the computer, working, for too many hours.

Haven't left the house, showered, brushed my hair er nuthin'.

My ass is killing me.

The cats are bored. Staring at me. Patiently awaiting salvation.

Basta. Roger that. 10-4.

Post Secret

2008-01-29T15:58:00.000-08:00

This is a blog where people make their own postcards, write a secret on the back, and then send it out. Some of them are pretty funny.

Love

2008-01-28T21:55:00.000-08:00

It doesn't happen overnight...

You grow it.

Ordinary Treasures

2008-01-27T18:32:00.000-08:00

I often fall in love with elements of my daily life, things that I see and experience every day.

I have an extra ordinary love for:

1. One cup of coffee in the morning.
2. Olive and Skeeter (in no particular order).
3. My computer.
4. My koala bear. His name is "Koala."
5. My camera.
6. My Plan de Paris.

Number 6 is a new love affair in my life. Everyday I must hold, and touch, and page through this little book with all the answers. It fits neatly in my bag, and never leaves my side. Because of it's unyielding commitment, and constant presence, it has become a sacred object to me.

I just wanted to tell the world about my special new friend.

Koala

2008-01-27T06:05:00.000-08:00

Koala has been on my bed for the last 28 years.

Is that embarrassing?

Centre Pompidou

2008-01-26T13:13:00.000-08:00

Went to Centre Pompidou today. It was awesome awesome awesome.

Inflatable furniture and environment concept. Crazy weirdos.

Restaurant

Amazing view.

On a side note, I'd just like to say, it's such a bummer that being a "diva" has become a celebrated personality trait. I hope it goes out of style soon.

Now what?

2008-01-24T12:13:00.000-08:00

I haven't been taking care of my virtual pet.

One more thing to feel guilty about.

Let's Dance

2008-01-23T14:28:00.001-08:00

o_0

2008-01-22T19:04:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to refrain from just getting on here and barfing up whatever comes into my head, but there's a really noisy bird outside, yammering on about something, and it's making me want to get into a bikini and sip on a Corona with sand in my crack.

I believe this is a feeling that should be shared.

Raise the Roof

2008-01-22T17:54:00.000-08:00

My roommate has gone to Madrid for the week, which has presented me with the opportunity to bring back an old, favorite tradition of mine, The One Girl Slumber Party.

I started this tradition when I was 22, and living in Madison, Wisconsin. I was overcome by my newly acquired ability to buy beer, and was looking to revel in it. The celebration consisted of a 6 pack, a few movies (all of my own choosing, an additional celebration of being single and autonomous), as much McDonalds as I cared to buy and/or eat, as many chocolate desserts as I cared to buy and/or eat, and my dog, Martini, and my two cats, Tigger and Garbonzo, to snuggle. These slumber parties were always a huge success.

This evening my One Girl Slumber Party has consisted of working on my laptop in front of French television with the sound turned down, while listening to Podcasts of This American Life, Radio Lab, and A Prairie Home Companion, getting hungry and eating a handful of almonds, then, at 3am, remembering my roommate left an unopened bottle of wine in the house, drinking it, of course, and snuggling with my two cats, Olive and Skeeter. (Martini,Tigger and Garbonzo are still alive, please don't worry, they just pee at my parent's and sister's house, respectively, now, instead of mine.)

Times change. I guess I'm all growed up.

Human Trade Update

2008-01-22T09:11:00.000-08:00

I have been bought and sold many times over.

Still unsure of how I should reciprocate this gesture, or even how I should feel about it.

Currently feeling nonplussed.

Strange Weirdness

2008-01-21T18:45:00.000-08:00

Oh my god. Facebook is pimping out its users with the application "Human Pets."

So Bizarre. I downloaded it, not really sure of what it was, and literally just moments later I had been SOLD!!! (Let it be known that I spend too much time with my cats because, despite what the spell check was telling me, I was positive that "literally" was in fact suppose to be spelled "litterally") SOLD!!! Sold to a man in Turkey!

What does this mean exactly? Am I suppose to message him, or invite him over for some dinner? I'm not really sure of the kind of protocol that should be followed in this situation. He nicknamed me "Green Dream." It sounds like some sort of Midori cocktail. Maybe I should make one if he comes over for dinner?

I'm going to have to sleep on all this madness and draw my conclusions in the morning.

I bought my roommate, Andrew, for sixty bucks. Maybe I'll nickname him "Dishwasher" or "Garbage Taker Outer" in the spirit of wishful thinking.

Careful how you swang that thang.

2008-01-21T09:58:00.000-08:00

You know that song by KC and the Sunshine Band that goes (Shake, Shake, Shake) Shake Your Booty...? Well, Paris MTV has a music video program named after it. So, put into French it turns into "Shake ton booty."

If you were here we'd be laughing about that together.

Shake it, don't break it.